one of the hardest days of my life…

i can’t figure out what face i wear is really mine…

i don’t know what God wants me to do…

i wish, i pray i can move forward…

so it’s the beginning of summer, my sisters are gone for 7 and a 1/2 weeks, and there is so much this summer that i have no idea what is going to happen that i am simply wanting to curl up and cry all day today.

but of course, i can’t, because i have an 7 pages of an essay about “true love” to write about, an anatomy and physiology final to study for, and a four hour shift at work tonight.

and i think that’s a blessing from God, because i’m being forced to think, to engage in life, and i can’t just slink away.

there are a few verses i need to focus on right now…

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.” – Hebrews 12:1-3

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” – James 1:2-4

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” – Romans 8:28

Abba, please help me to see your hand working in this, for my good, for your glory, knowing that you’ve got everything under control.
Help me to trust in you with everything i have, knowing and living in the fact that you are God.